Help For The Wakeful

Worried that you’ll have trouble sleeping tonight because you’re so excited about an anticipated visit from St. Nicholas? Worried that Santa will leave lumps of coal in your stocking as punishment because you’re not snoozing when he arrives the way good little boys and girls are supposed to be doing?

Or are you kept awake with anxiety because you’re not a Christian, don’t expect any midnight ministrations from jolly old elves in red suits or anybody else, and have the distinct feeling that none of the Republicans who are hoping to become your President really believe in their heart of hearts that non-Christians like you are thoroughgoing American citizens like they are?

Well, don’t let your sleep deprivation paralyze you. There’s still time to rush to one of those malls that are staying open late on Christmas Eve, where you’ll hopefully find at least one bookstore that’s selling Awake!, a brand new anthology of writings (plus a few comics and some photo spreads) that address the subject of insomnia.

This choice literary compendium is edited by Steven Lee Beeber and includes contributions by such luminaries like Joyce Carol Oates, Margaret Atwood, and, uh, me!!

Buying this book won’t solve your Santa dilemma, since you’ll be so engrossed in reading it that you’ll stay awake even later than you would have if you had simply lain in bed tonight fretting. And it certainly won’t make you feel any safer from the belligerent religiosity running rampant across the land.

But you may find yourself so delightfully distracted by this entertaining bundle of reading matter that you’ll barely hear the sounds of coal chunks dropping plop, plop, plop into the stockings (if indeed there be any) hanging from your mantelpiece (if there be such) in some distant, dark room of your dwelling.

And sometime between 1:00 and 6:00 on Christmas morning (if you buy this book today) you may find yourself reading "A Little Night Misery," my Headrack story from the third issue of Barefootz Funnies that was published in 1979 and has now been out of print for a quarter-century.

About Howard

I'm a cartoonist and writer, best known for my graphic novel, Stuck Rubber Baby, and my comic strip from the 1980s, Wendel.
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0 Responses to Help For The Wakeful

  1. Buy extra copies with which to cleverly replace local Jehovah’s Witness’s stockpiles of Awake! magazine – guaranteed laffs!